I think searching for the reason of life is difficult but the reason for your life not so much. This is a bit harder to write than most things I have written because looking up the definition of defines is extremely redundant. I think many things describe us but how many of those things truly define us? As I do research, I realize a great many men and women - and possibly everything in between - have tried to find the answer and have failed. Is it the things we do? Is it the people we spend our time with? Our jobs, cars, schools, or places we frequent? I think not.
The true definition of define is to explain or identify the nature or essential qualities of, but also to describe. I can be described by a great many things I’m thin, muscular, haunted, and generally, I don’t care about most peoples opinion. I’ve struggled with addiction and have a hankering wanderlust that never seems to go away. I’m a lover of science and don’t so much have a love for flat-earthers; however, that doesn’t identify the nature of me or explain me. Although, I bet I have a pretty good idea what does.
“My past has not defined me, destroyed me, deterred me, or defeated me; it has only strengthened me. – Steve Maraboli
I think it's our strength that defines us. My son's mother - though faced with the bad luck of a bent horseshoe - could have lied down and tapped out, instead she fought through a nauseating amount of mishaps and problems and she didn’t give up, what defines her is strength. That’s not all that defines her, even I don’t know all of them. I do know more than most people, a lot of it good and some bad. In some ways I had to be strong, our son had to be strong, all so we could all continue to grow and thrive, to persevere. I believe strength is part of the answer. Does the way you look define you? In certain circumstances I think it does, but not in the way you can’t change. It’s in the things you can change; cleanliness, neatness, a smile, or just being ugly. When I say ugly I’m not talking about looks at all, I’m talking being miserable, nasty, and mean.
I try not to be nasty and mean. I try to be a good person and I think a lot of us do, for some of us it gets lost in translation and for some of us we are just nasty people. We all know who the nasty people in our lives are if you don’t know chances are it’s you, if that upsets you, you are the one, but you already knew that. There is good news, it takes time but sometimes people can change, it’s not easy, but it’s not impossible either. If you can put in the effort to change, I think that speaks to what defines you.
At the end of the first installment; no one can define you and neither can your past actions. We are all the author of our own stories if you don’t like your story…try writing about something else.
Until next time stay classy San Diego.